After consuming three half pitchers of sangria, I vaguely recall resting in a thicket of wiry shrubs in a park along the highway. Danni's milk crate snapped off of her bike while we were rolling through Lincoln Street, and everything fell out of her bag, including her wallet. Also including the belongings inside her wallet falling both out of her bag and out of her wallet, miraculously. We eventually hopped over the barrier separating the road from Golden Gate Park, and looked for any more lost items. This lead to a wrestling match in the shrubs, which I obviously won by a large margin.

We left our bikes and bags along the sidewalk as we napped in the park; an idea implemented by a collaboration of two drunken minds deeming it safe to leave our shit behind. In my bag:

1. Two different types of Old Spice deodorant.
2. Two pairs of the same shitty headphones I bought at Walgreen's.
3. One pair of not-as-shitty headphones that I stole from Danni.
   
4. 4 napkins in case my nose gets mad runny from allergies.
   
5. David Foster Wallace's, "Infinite Jest."
6. Roughly one dollar in change.
7. One pair of Nordstom's underwear that have not ever been worn.

In Danni's bag:

1. Danni's mad tight journal with Sagittarius written in gold print across the pink cover.
2. Probably a pen to write in the journal.
3. David Foster Wallace's, "Infinite Jest."
4. Both vinyl and compact disc editions of Jay-Z's "Bitches and Sisters" single.
5. Limited edition Andrew Jackson Jihad ipod with autographs engraved on the metallic backside. You're probably not even close to punk enough to have ever heard of this.

Moving on, a girl passing by the scene of the spill noticed our bikes and bags abandoned. She was wearing an adorable black helmet that was bobbling around the top of her head as she was talking to us. She was probably rollin' up to our shit thinking, "Yo this is hella tight. XFREE SHITX!!!11." until she realized that we were laying in the distance, listening to her thoughts. I calmly told her, "Get with the program." as I rolled up my sleeves to reveal my gargantuan biceps. She wisely got with the program.

Danni was so impressed with how I dealt with the situation, and rightfully so, that she took her right shoe off and threw it at a bush in a moment of raw excitement. I took it to be a west coast way of showing her appreciation for my actions, and a very nice one. I showed her the east coast way of showing appreciation for people showing appreciation to you by giving her my right shoe as a consolation. She put it on and we started pedaling home until I thought to myself, "This is bullshit. Why should I be the one to ride home with one shoe, having the metal teeth of the pedal digging into my foot? Why should I encourage spastic behavior?"

The rest of the night sadly becomes a blur. I remember falling onto the couch, taking my shoes off, and falling asleep.

CORRECTION: 3 half pitchers of sangria were consumed. As we were leaving, Danni noticed that someone left between 1/6th and 1/7th of a pitcher behind. We also sat at their table and finished it for them.